Summer Love
by Pancakes.On.A.Rainy.Day
Summary: Connect 3 is taking a break from fans and paparazzis and invites the Gellars on vacation. Will it all just be; Sun, Fun and Love? Naitlyn!
1. Nate's Girl

**AN: I'm starting my second story.. :)) It's a Naitlyn ,, yay,, love them, hope you do too.. lol :D I'm just super happy that my last exam is tomorrow and then it's SUMMER !! :)) My mind have been on nothing but summer in the last couple of days, so i thought I would do a summer-story.. :)  
Caitlyn is not described as a boyish girl, as she is in a lots of fics,,, and her clothing style is also more girly (than in the movie - not that I don't like her look in the movie, just doing something else) but not too girly (that means no pink stuff),, so don't worry.. :)**

**Hope you like it ! and please REVIEW ! :D**

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"I love you" Nate said as he broke of the kissing and looked into Caitlyn's deep brown eyes.

"I love you too." She said with a smile, before starting the kissing again.

They were on the bed; Nate in shorts and stripped to the waist, Caitlyn only in her underwear. She had just been to bath and when she was getting dressed Nate had been surprising her by kissing and dragging her to the bed. And now they lay on the bed in a heavy make-out session.

They were on vacation with their families. Connect 3 were taking a couple of weeks break from the busy rock star life, and had been inviting the Gellars to join them on their vacation. And now both families were settled on a wonderful island in The Caribbean Sea. The band had picked the island because it wasn't very crowded and they got a break from fans and paparazzis.

The hotel was nice too. It was divided in small cabins; a huge skyscraper didn't really fit into the small island. The cabins were nice and comfortable and Nate and Caitlyn shared one.

"Maybe we should get dressed." Caitlyn mumbled

"I don't want too," Nate said grumpy.

"Can't we just stay here – and kiss?" He said right after and started to kiss Caitlyn again.

Nate's grumpy voice made Caitlyn laugh a bit.

"We have to get up, we're going to dinner." She said.

"I know." Nate said with a little smile, before he kissed her one last time and stood up.

* * *

Mrs. Gray and Mrs. Gellar were already at the restaurant which was located at the beach. They had been coming earlier than the plan and sat there and talked. The two of them had known each other in a very long time. They had been going to school together when they were younger and they had been keeping in touch since the day they graduated. Now their children Nate and Caitlyn were boyfriend and girlfriend and had been it for a little more than a year. After they had been starting to date the two families had been seeing each other a lot more.

"It makes me so happy to see Nate with Caitlyn, "Mrs. Gray said, "She makes him so happy."

"He makes her happy as well." Mrs. Gellar said, "Before she met Nate she was always sitting at home and either was bored or grumpy, now she's smiling almost all the time."

"They truly love each other," Mrs. Gray said, "You can see it on the smiles and the glances."

"Yes," Mrs. Gellar said, "I'm really happy for them."

* * *

Nate and Caitlyn made their way to the beach.

"You look beautiful." Nate said.

"Thanks." Caitlyn said with a smile. She was wearing a short beige summer dress with laces and a cardigan in the same colour.

They walked hand in hand down to the restaurant at the beach. The only one there was Mrs. Gray and Mrs. Gellar.

"Hey." Caitlyn said hugging her mum.

"Hey lovebirds." Mrs. Gray said and Nate gave her a strange look which she returned with a smile.

Soon Shane, Jason, Mr. Gray, Mr. Gellar and Ryan (Caitlyn's 9-year old brother) appeared.

* * *

"That guy behind the counter in the bar is checking you out." Shane whispered to Caitlyn under the dinner.

"No he isn't." Caitlyn whispered back without taking a look at the guy.

"Well he is," Shane whispered again, "take a look."

Caitlyn looked up and the guy Shane was talking about was standing with his back against her.

"He isn't." She whispered again.

"He was staring before." Shane whispered back.

"Well maybe that was because I'm sitting between two members of a world-wide known band." Caitlyn whispered.

"What are you two whispering about?" Nate whispered as he moved closer to Caitlyn and obviously imitating the two of them.

"Another guy got your girl on sight." Shane said

Caitlyn rolled her eyes with a laugh

"You're dreaming Shane." She said

"Who is it?" Nate asked referring to his brother and obviously ignoring Caitlyn's comment.

"The guy who is working in the bar." Shane said with a grin on his face.

Nate looked up at the bar but the guy was still standing with his back against them.

They continued the eating and after some minutes Caitlyn looked up at the bar. And she noticed that the guy was starring at her. He caught her eyes and winked at her.

She immediately looked down and whispered to Shane: "Now he totally winked at me."

"That's what I said." Shane said with excitement in his voice.

"What did you say?" Jason asked from the other side of the table. He had been busy concentrating on his food and he hadn't heard what they had been talking about.

"Nothing Jase... Just forget it." Caitlyn said.

When the time passed 9 pm, a small orchestra came onto a little scene in the restaurant. They started to play some music and soon a lot of people were on the dance floor.

Nate and Caitlyn had actually been taking dancing lessons since they could walk. Not together all of the time but two years ago Caitlyn started at the dance school Nate was dancing at and they became partners.

Soon they were out on the dance floor as well, swaying to the music. The rest of the two families except from Ryan were soon also out on the dance floor. Ryan was talking with a new friend he had been meeting on the beach the day before.

Shane was dancing with some girl and they danced over to Nate and Caitlyn. While still dancing Shane made Nate a sign which made him look at the guy in the bar. He was starring intense at him and Caitlyn.

Nate and Caitlyn walked back to the table and sat down. They turned to look down at the beach. They looked at the sunset. It was beautiful. The sun made everything seem orange. Nate looked down at Caitlyn's face. She looked at the sun and Nate could see the light from the sun in her eyes. It looked beautiful. She looked beautiful. She was perfect. Everything was perfect. Nate smiled as she looked up at him.

"What are you looking at?" She asked with a smile.

"The most beautiful girl on earth." He said and kissed her cheek.

They turned to look at everyone else. They were still on the dance floor having a lot of fun. Nate looked at the guy in the bar, he was still starring but seemed to look down when he noticed Nate was looking. Nate lifted Caitlyn's chin and kissed her on the mouth. Caitlyn was a bit surprised but it didn't show. They usually didn't kiss in public or in front of their families. They actually kept almost everything private.

"What was that for?" She whispered

Nate looked at the guy in the bar and so did Caitlyn. He had a shocked look on his face which made Caitlyn laugh a bit.

"I understand now." She said with a smile.

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**And to everyone; Remember to pick up Lines, Vines and Trying Times tomorrow, june 16th !!! :D - I will love you for that,, .... and for your review...... lol :))**


	2. Lovebirds

**AN: Wow ,, I seriously didn't thought that you guys would think it was that good,,, ;) but then I might just keep it going.. lol.. The next chapters will probably not be updatet as fast as this one, cause I haven't really made a story line yet, so I don't know where this is going,... I will make an outline,, and then I will update,. :)) (well that's my plan for now,, but maybe the next chapter is also just writing itself.. hmm.,. we will see..) **

**Hope you like it and REVIEW please.. :))**

"Morning sunshine..." Nate whispered at Caitlyn as her eyes opened.

"Morning… What's the time?" She answered while burying her head in Nate's chest.

"It's 7 am," He said, "Wanna go for a morning swim?"

Caitlyn smiled and said: "Why not."

Nate was the only one who could get her up in the morning before at least 10 am.

They changed to swimwear and grabbed some towels. They were the only one on the beach and that was perfect for them. The sun was on its way up on the other side of the island, so it was still a little dark where they were. But the air was warm and so was the water. They placed their towels on a big stone. The only stone on the beach. Lying there in the sand, with only sand around it.

Nate grabbed Caitlyn's hand and started to run against the water. Caitlyn had no other choice than just follow him.

"Nate.. Wait.." Caitlyn said while running and laughing at his excitement.

Nate stopped right in front of the water and pulled Caitlyn close to his body.

"A little too excited are we?" Caitlyn asked with a grin on her face.

Nate laughed along before kissing her on the mouth. As they stood there kissing with their feet in the water the sun rose above the palm trees and the morning light was shining on the two of them. They both stopped the kissing and looked at the sun. After a moment of silence Nate surprised Caitlyn by lifting her up bridal style and walking out to the water.

Caitlyn let out a little scream when Nate surprised her, but it fast turned in to laughter. Caitlyn was holding her arms around Nate's neck and looked at him with happiness in her eyes. Nate looked down at her and smiled.

"I love you." Caitlyn said with a dreamy voice **(AN: don't really know how that sounds :P lol..)**

"I love you too." Nate said as he stopped walking. The water was now reaching Nate to the chest and almost Caitlyn's whole body except for her head was under water.

Nate turned around in the water. It made Caitlyn giggle. She leaned her head backwards so her hair got under the water.

Nate loved the way her giggle was filled with joy and happiness. It made him smile and think about how much he loved her. He pulled her closer to his body and one of her hands moved to play with one of his messy curls. Nate gently kissed Caitlyn on the mouth and their heads were resting at each others foreheads. They looked in to each others eyes and smiled. After a moment Caitlyn kissed Nate again and they kept kissing.

* * *

Shane woke up seeing Jason by the window.

"What are you looking at?" He asked him after sitting up in the bed.

"Birds.." Jason said without turning his head.

"Of course" Shane said to himself and walked to the bathroom. When he came back Jason still stood by the window.

"Wow.." He suddenly said.

"What?" Shane said walking to the window.

"These birds are so beautiful; I have never seen anything like them." Jason said, "I mean look there are all colours; blue, red, yellow……"

But Shane wasn't listening anymore he had seen two very interesting birds in the water.

"Look," Shane said with a smile, "I found some lovebirds."

"That isn't really a race Shane." Jason said with annoyance not looking at the place Shane had told him to.

"I mean Nate and Caitlyn," Shane said, "Look in the water."

"Ohh," Jason said, "That's so sweet."

"Now you're starting to sound like a girl." Shane said and looked at Jason with a strange look on his face.

"Well, they are obvious so in love." Jason said.

Shane looked at Nate and Caitlyn again. They were kissing and once in a while they broke it off and smiled and laughed at each other. They were really in love.

"Yea… You're right," Shane said with a smile.

Shane was very happy for his little brother. He had finally found the perfect girl and they were so in love. And Shane liked Caitlyn too. Everyone liked Caitlyn. She was a close friend of the band and Shane had an idea that she was keeping them grounded. She was so down on earth and it didn't look like it affected her that she was hanging out with a famous boy band.

* * *

Caitlyn and Nate made their way back to the stone and their towels. Nate was still carrying Caitlyn and her head rested on his shoulder. Nate sat Caitlyn down on the stone and she wrapped her towel around her.

They walked back to their cabin hand in hand. After taking a bath at getting changed they walked down to restaurant to get some breakfast. Shane and Jason were already there eating.

"Good morning lovebirds." Shane said with a smile.

"Shane how many times am I going to tell you that isn't a bird?" Jason said with annoyance and Shane rolled his eyes with a grin.

"Good morning." Caitlyn said and sat down.

"Did you and mum decided to call us lovebirds or what," Nate asked Shane, "Cause it's really creepy."

"No we didn't. Jase and I were just looking at birds this morning and we found a new race… Lovebirds… in the water." Shane said with a smirk.

"It's not a race." Jason said again

Caitlyn and Nate slightly blushed.

"Jase thought it was sweet…" Shane said with a smile.

"You thought it was sweet too." Jason said with a smirk at Shane.

"You got that all wrong bro…" Shane answered.

"No you're just too tough to admit it." Jason said with a laugh.

The two of them kept arguing about whether Shane thought Nate and Caitlyn were sweet or not. And all four of them knew that Shane thought they were just as sweet as Jason thought.

Nate looked at Caitlyn who smiled at him and rolled his eyes with a smile.

They started to eat some breakfast and soon the rest of the two families were joining them. And it seemed like Nate and Caitlyn's morning wasn't as private as they had been thinking. Mrs. And Mr. Gray had apparently also been looking out of their window this morning, and now everyone were whispering about the two lovebirds in the water.

Nate and Caitlyn just pretended to not hear what the others were talking about. But they soon realised that they were going to be called lovebirds a lot more.

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	3. A Walk Before The Storm

**AN: I think I have an idea of where this is going,,, it can change again,, but here is the next chapter, and I hope you like it,, and please Review,. then you're a sweety.. ;)))**

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After breakfast Nate and Caitlyn decided to go for a walk to see the island. They walked on the beach hand in hand, Nate with his guitar on the back. After walking about fifteen minutes the beach stopped and they had reached the small harbour. When they had been arriving to the island they had been coming with a neat little boat in to the harbour. On the harbour there was a small souvenir shop and a kiosk. Nothing else. As mentioned; the island wasn't too crowded. The only customers in the kiosk were three girls buying some ice creams but suddenly they ran out of the kiosk and left there ice creams behind.

"Omg, that's Nate Gray!" One of the girls screamed as all three of them started to run against Nate and Caitlyn.

Nate and Caitlyn had been standing with their backs against the kiosk and had been looking out on the water. They fast turned around when they heard screaming and soon the three girls were all over them – or Nate mostly.

"We love you so much!" They kept screaming.

"Girls, calm down," Nate said, "You have to remember to breathe."

As on command the three girls embarrassed stopped the screaming.

"So you are fans." Nate said after a moment.

"Yes," One of the girls said excited, "Can we have your autograph?"

"Of course." Nate said and started to sign different things he was handed.

While signing Nate once looked at Caitlyn as if he was saying; 'One minute and I will be right there'. Caitlyn just smiled at him. It seemed like none of the girls were aware of her presence.

After three awkward hugs Nate turned to Caitlyn and took her hand.

"Let's go." He whispered before starting to walk, dragging Caitlyn with him.

"Long time no fans huh?" Caitlyn said with a grin.

"Yea, I kind of forgot the feeling of being recognized." Nate answered

"I have to ask you something." Caitlyn said after a moment of silence.

"Go ahead." Nate answered and looked at Caitlyn.

"How does it feel when people you don't know say 'I love you' all the time?" Caitlyn asked

"It's odd cause, when people I don't know say it it's like I don't even hear it, I mean, I do feel happy that I have fans that "love" me, but that's the only feeling I get," Nate said, "If you say 'I love you' it's a whole other story."

"What story would it be then?" Caitlyn asked with a smirk. Both she and Nate knew they weren't talking about fans anymore.

"When you say it; I'm burning up!" Nate said with a smile which made Caitlyn smile even more.

Nate and Caitlyn soon reached some rocks but that wasn't stopping their little journey. They kept walking and soon they found a little path between the rocks. They fast figured out that they were on the point of the island, and if they continued the walk they would soon be on the beach again and not very far from their hotel.

But right now there was only water to see. The water was splashing on the rocks when the water from the two sites of the island met.

"Let's stay here for a while," Nate said, "I need a break."

"Okay." Caitlyn said and sat down on a rock.

Nate sat down beside her and wrapped his arm around her shoulder. Caitlyn looked at him and smiled. She knew that he didn't need a break, he needed a kiss, but she was just going to wait for it.

It didn't take several minutes before Nate bent down and kissed her passionately on the mouth.

"I love you." Caitlyn said when they broke apart.

"I'm burning up." Nate said with a grin before continuing the kissing.

Caitlyn smiled into the kiss. She was so happy. Nate was just the perfect guy. People were always saying; 'Finally she opened her eyes and saw the great thing in boys' or 'Finally she got her first boyfriend'.

"If only they knew." She thought. Nate wasn't her first boyfriend but she was the only one who knew – her first boyfriend didn't even know anymore.

"And I love you too." Nate said cutting through her thoughts.

Caitlyn smiled and for Nate's surprise she hugged him holding her arms around his neck. Nate 'joined' the hug by wrapping his arms tight around Caitlyn's body.

"You wanna hear a new song?" Nate asked after a couple of minutes.

Caitlyn pulled out of the hug and said: "Sure."

Nate started to tune his guitar and then he played the song.

_oh oh yeah. ohhh yeah.  
__If the heart is always searching,  
__Can you ever find a home?  
__I've been looking for that someone,  
__I'll never make it on my own  
__Dreams can't take the place of loving you,  
__There's gotta be a million reasons why it's true_

_When you look me in the eyes,  
__And tell me that you love me  
__Everything's alright,  
__When you're right here by my side  
__When you look me in the eyes,  
__I catch a glimpse of heaven  
__I find my paradise,  
__When you look me in the eyes_

_How long will I be waiting,  
__To be with you again?  
__Gonna tell you that I love you,  
__In the best way that I can  
__I can't take a day without you here,  
__You're the light that makes my darkness disappear._

_When you look me in the eyes,  
__And tell me that you love me  
__Everything's alright,  
__When you're right here by my side  
__When you look me in the eyes,  
__I catch a glimpse of heaven  
__I find my paradise,  
__When you look me in the eyes_

_Movin' on__, I start to realize,  
__I can reach my tomorrow,  
__I can hold my head high,  
__And it's all because you're by my side_

_When you look me in the eyes,  
__And tell me that you love me  
__Everything's alright,  
__When you're right here by my side  
__When I hold you in my arms  
__I know that it's forever  
__I just gotta__ let you know,  
__I never wanna let you go_

_When you look me in the eyes,  
__And tell me that you love me  
__Everything's alright,  
__When you're right here by my side  
__When you look me in the eyes,  
__I catch a glimpse of heaven  
__I find my paradise,  
__When you look me in the eyes  
__Oh yeah_

When he was done Caitlyn had tears in her eyes.

"Hey, baby what's wrong?" Nate said when he looked at Caitlyn.

"Nothing, it's so beautiful," She said with a smile, "happy tears."

"I'm glad you like it, - you're the first one to hear it." Nate said with a smile before embracing Caitlyn in a hug.

"I love you." He whispered in to her ear.

Suddenly Nate felt a drop of water on his hand. He looked up and saw that a big black cloud was above their heads. Caitlyn looked up too and said: "We better get going."

"Yea." Nate said and they stood up. Then it started to rain and it rained a lot. Nate grabbed his guitar in one hand and Caitlyn's hand in the other and started to run. Caitlyn ran closely behind Nate. She could feel the huge raindrops on her skin and soon her clothes were soaked wet.

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**OK, Let's make all those 'views' in to 'reviews' lol :D (haha I thought a lot about that one)**


	4. Not Feeling Too Well

**AN: Thank you so much to those who reviewed,, I get so happy when I receive one... and it makes me write.. ! :)) - so keep them coming ;P lol..  
Hope you like this chapter,.. :))**

It kept raining for the rest of the day. Nate, Caitlyn, Shane, Jason and Ryan were in Nate and Caitlyn's cabin drinking hot chocolate and coffee.

Caitlyn lay on the bed reading a magazine. Shane and Ryan were playing a game of cards on the floor. Jason sat in the armchair with his guitar playing some chords. And Nate tried to dry his guitar with tissues, towels and Caitlyn's hairdryer.

"How's it going Nate?" Caitlyn asked.

"Forward- slowly but forward." He answered with a smile. He was happy he hadn't been bringing his favorite guitar on vacation.

When it was time for dinner it still rained a lot and no one really wanted to go outside. And they didn't have to, because suddenly someone knocked on the door. Nate walked to the door to open it and it was their parents standing on the porch. They had a lot of cup noodles and some bread from the kiosk.

"Hey, what do you guys say to a noodle party?" Mr. Gellar said

"Why not." Nate said and let them in.

They had two electric kettles and they started to boil some water for the noodles. Soon all of them were eating cup noodles. It seemed like there were people everywhere; they were nine persons in a room for two. Caitlyn thought it was kind of comfortable. Sitting there together with the people she loved.

"Nate what have you done to your guitar?" Mrs. Gray asked worried.

"I was kind of outside when it started to rain." Nate said

"Ohh," Mrs. Gray said not knowing what to say.

Soon everyone was deep in conversations with each other. Their parents had been bringing the chairs from their rooms, so Caitlyn still had the bed for herself. She wasn't talking to anyone just watching everyone else in peace. Nate was talking to her dad. She tried to hear what they were saying but she couldn't.

Soon Nate and Mr. Gellar finished their conversation and Mr. Gellar started to talk to Mr. Gray. Nate looked at Caitlyn in the bed and noticed that she was starring at him. He smiled at her and she returned it. Nate stood up from the floor and made his way to the bed.

"Hey... Enjoying your noodles?" He asked Caitlyn as he sat down beside her.

"Sure." She said with a smile.

"What are you thinking of?" Nate whispered

"How blessed I am," She said, "Having the people I love around me."

Nate smiled and kissed her cheek.

* * *

The next day Caitlyn woke up and Nate was still sleeping which was very unusual as Nate was the morning person. Caitlyn checked the time on Nate's wristwatch which lay on the table beside the bed. It was almost 9:30 am - even more unusual. Caitlyn noticed the sweat on Nate's forehead.

"Nate," She whispered while she slightly shook his body. Soon he opened his eyes a bit.

"Caity… I have such a headache." He muttered.

"You need some sugar." Caitlyn said and stood up from the bed. She quickly found some sugar in the pocket of his jeans from the day before.

"Here eat." She said as she handed it to Nate. Then she walked to the bathroom and made him a glass of water. When she came back Nate was almost sitting up in the bed looking really pale in his face. He drank all the water and lay back down again. Caitlyn sat beside him on the bed taking his head in her lap. She started to stroke his hair.

"You are the best Caity…" He muttered before falling asleep again. Caitlyn smiled and kissed his cheek.

Caitlyn took a shower and when she came out of the bath Nate was checking his blood sugar.

"What does it say?" She asked

"It's very low," Nate answered, "I will just stay here and sleep a little longer."

"Okay," Caitlyn said, "Sure you're gonna be alright?"

"Yes, I will be fine," Nate said, "Don't worry, just go and have some breakfast."

Caitlyn smiled and kissed Nate on the forehead.

"I love you." She said

Nate smiled and said; "I love you too."

* * *

Caitlyn made her way to the restaurant. Everyone else was there.

"Sorry I'm so late," She said, "My alarm clock isn't feeling too well."

"What's wrong with him?" Shane asked, being the only one to catch her joke.

"Diabetes," She said, "He just wants to sleep."

"Is he okay?" Mrs. Gray said worried now knowing they were talking about Nate.

"He's really low," Caitlyn said, "But he just need some sleep."

When Caitlyn was done eating she took some food and walked back to her cabin. Nate was still asleep and she didn't want to wake him up. She lay down on the bed beside him. He looked so peaceful when he slept.

After a little while Nate noticed Caitlyn was there and he wrapped his arm around her and held her close to his body. Then he continued the sleeping. Caitlyn smiled and soon she fell asleep too.

When they woke up the time was almost 11:30.

"I brought you some food." Caitlyn said.

"Thanks." Nate said and kissed her.

While Nate was eating and taking a bath, Caitlyn walked down to the beach.

Her mom, Mrs. Gray and Ryan sat at one of the small tables under a palm tree.

"Hey Caitlyn," Mrs. Gray said, "How's Nate?"

"I think he's a little better." She said.

Mrs. Gray and Mrs. Gellar continued their talking which obviously didn't interested Ryan.

"I'm bored," He said to Caitlyn, "There's nothing to do"

"We could take a swim." Caitlyn said and smiled.

Ryan was already on his way to the water when he with a smile said: "Then come"

Caitlyn took off her denim shorts and her top and walked after Ryan. He ran out in the water and when Caitlyn reached him he started to splash the water on her. Caitlyn screamed and soon the two of them were having a water battle.

Meanwhile Nate had walked down to the beach too. He saw Caitlyn and her brother in the water having fun. He smiled at them.

"Hey Nate," Mrs. Gray said, "Are you feeling better?"

"A bit." Nate said as he sat down on a chair and leaned his head against his hands.

Mrs. Gray gave him a little hug and said: "You should go to the hammock and rest."

Nate walked to the place on the beach were the hammock hang. He lay in it for a little while and then Caitlyn came with her towel wrapped around her.

"Hey," Caitlyn said, "How are you?"

"Honestly I'm bad," Nate said, "But if you joined me in here I would definitely feel better."

Caitlyn smiled and joined Nate in the hammock. Nate wrapped his arms around her and kissed her passionately on the mouth.

"I love you." He said when they broke apart.

"I love you too." She said with a smile.

Nate looked up and noticed that their mothers who still sat at the table a little longer away were looking in their direction. It was obviously that they were talking about them. Nate ducked so they couldn't see him and continued to kiss Caitlyn.

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**Review please.. :) - and I will write :P**

**I really loooooveee World War 3 ,, singing along to it right now,, . I'm totally ruining the song.. lol :D !**

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	5. Heavily Broken

**AN: Now something is happening.. I guess. :P lol.. This chapter is kind of different - it has a lot of thoughts in it .Hope you like it ... Let me know what you think :)) **

**Btw I also want to thank of course those who reviewed but also those who subscribed and added this to their favorite list. :))**

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The next day Caitlyn woke up early. She had a strange feeling in her stomach. Today a year ago it happened. The day she had been trying to forget so long. Sometimes she thought about it but then she just pushed it back in her head and thought about how happy she was instead. Happy. What a word. Caitlyn was happy at the special moments when she was with Nate. She was happy when she was with her family. But when she was alone she wasn't happy. Deep inside her mind a sadness grew bigger and bigger each day. She had thought that if she just tried to forget the cause of the sadness, the sadness would disappear too. But it didn't. It kept staying inside her mind. Growing. When she felt the sadness she also felt so alone. No one was there to share her sadness. No one knew. Or they did but she didn't know them. She was lost with her own sadness and she didn't have a clue how to get rid of it. Talking to somebody? No. No one really wanted to hear it – she was sure of that. It had nothing to do with their lives. It was in her past. The time she didn't show who she really was. She kept her feelings and her values to herself. And she was the only one knowing what was on her mind. She never told anyone – until that day she met him. He had changed her. Forever. She should be happy but she just wasn't.

All those thoughts were on her mind, and she couldn't fall asleep again. She stood up and decided to sit on the porch. She brought Nate's guitar. She had always liked to sing and write songs. But no one knew. She had been sharing the interest with him. It was their thing. She started to sing a song she recently had been writing.

_Everyday I sit here waiting  
__Everyday just seems so long  
__And now I've had enough of all the hating  
__Do we even care, it's so unfair  
__Any day it'll all be over  
__Everyday there's nothing new  
__And now I just try to find some hope  
__To try and hold onto  
__But it starts again  
__It'll never end_

_I'm heavily broken  
__And I don't know what to do  
__Can't you see that I'm choking  
__And I can't even move  
__When there's nothing left to say  
__What can you do  
__I'm heavily broken  
__And there's nothing I can do_

_Almost giving up on trying  
__Almost heading for a fall  
__And now my mind is screaming out  
__I've gotta keep on fighting  
__But then again  
__It doesn't end_

_I'm heavily broken  
__And I don't know what to do  
__Can't you see that I'm choking  
__And I can't even move  
__When there's nothing left to say  
__What can you do?  
__I'm heavily broken  
__And there's nothing I can do  
__And there's nothing I can do_

_Feels like I'm drowning  
__I'm screaming for air  
__Louder I'm crying  
__And you don't even care_

_I'm heavily broken  
And I don't know what to do  
Can't you see that I'm choking  
And I can't even move  
When there's nothing left to say  
What can you do  
I'm heavily broken_

* * *

Meanwhile Nate had woken up. He turned around expecting to see a sleeping Caitlyn but she wasn't there. He checked the time to make sure he hadn't slept as long as the day before. But it was only 6:30. If Caitlyn was up that early something wasn't right.

Suddenly he heard a sound from outside the cabin. He listened to it. A girl was singing. He had never heard that voice before. It was so pure and beautiful. Maybe Caitlyn had been making a new friend. No matter who it was it had to be someone close to Caitlyn - if it was the person who had made her stand up before 6:30. He thought he was the only one who was capable of that.

Nate stood up and walked to the door. When he laid his hand on the doorknob he remembered that he wasn't wearing anything but boxers and a t-shirt. He decided to just look out of the window in the door. He drew the little curtain to the side and saw a girl sitting with her back against him playing on a guitar – his guitar. He looked around the room to get it confirmed - his was missing.

He looked at the girl again and got surprised when he recognised Caitlyn's long curly hair. It was her. _She_ was singing. _She_ was the girl with the wonderful voice. Caitlyn – his Caitlyn – he thought he knew everything about. Wow.

Nate fast jumped in a pair of jeans and slowly with no sound opened the door and walked out on the porch. Caitlyn sat on the steps which led to the porch so she didn't notice Nate sitting in the chair two meters behind her.

As Nate sat there listening to Caitlyn sing he suddenly felt like he wanted to walk over to her and embrace her in a hug. Whatever the song was about it was sad. He wondered what made her write something like that. Well he thought that she had been writing it. He was sure he hadn't heard it before – but what did he know. Nate started to wonder if anyone knew Caitlyn could sing like that.

Before he knew it Caitlyn stopped singing. She stayed in the same position in a moment before taking a deep breath. Then she stood up and turned around. When she noticed Nate she jumped a bit.

"You shocked me." She said.

"You shocked me too." Nate answered calm with a smile standing up.

"How long have you been sitting there?" Caitlyn asked.

"A couple of minutes." Nate said as he walked over to Caitlyn and took her hand. Then he dragged her inside again and closed the door behind them.

It was obvious that Caitlyn wasn't feeling happy. Nate took the guitar out of her hand and laid it on the bed. Then he turned to Caitlyn and took both of her hands in his. Caitlyn was looking down so he lifted up her chin. Nate looked her in the eyes and kissed her lips gently. A little smile formed on Caitlyn's lips but it fast faded again. She rested her forehead against Nate's shoulder and Nate wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug.

"Your singing is amazing." He whispered after a minute of silence.

Caitlyn smiled into his shoulder. Maybe she could share the singing with Nate too. Well she didn't really have a choice – he knew. Maybe it could be their thing too. But it would probably remind her of _him_. Seemed like everything did anyway. But this was one of those moments where she was happy.

She lifted her head from Nate's shoulder and wrapped her arms around his neck. Nate smiled down at her.

"I love you." She said and reached up to kiss Nate.

"I love you too." He said. He was a little surprised that the sadness in her eyes suddenly disappeared but he didn't think more about it he just enjoyed the moment.

* * *

**Hope you liked it and please review.. :))**


	6. Confusion

**AN****: (IMPORTANT READ!!) Don't worry both Nate and Caitlyn are still there, and none of them has any serious health problems. :))**

**I'm going on vacation on Saturday, so I think this one will be my last update before I leave (have a lot to prepare). I will be back in 3 weeks and then I will continue the story, so hope you will still read. I thought about writing in the car (on paper) so I can update as soon as I get home. But don't really know if I can without getting carsick,, and I don't know if I feel comfortable writing with people around me, and they will probably be very curious (I'm not showing this to anyone.)**

**Hope you like it and please review :))**

* * *

Sitting eating breakfast at the restaurant the strange feeling in Caitlyn's stomach came back. Soon she lost her appetite and stopped eating. Her mother noticed.

"Caitlyn are you not going to eat anything?" She asked.

"I'm not hungry." Caitlyn answered.

"Did you eat already?" Her mother asked knowing that her daughter's most appreciated meal in the day normally was breakfast.

"Yes, I woke up early and ate… something." She lied

Nate noticed that Caitlyn looked sad again and he squeezed her hand under the table. She squeezed it back but kept looking down.

* * *

"What's wrong with Caitlyn?" Shane asked Nate after breakfast.

She had been walking back to the cabin before everyone else was done eating, excusing herself that she wasn't feeling too well.

"I don't know," Nate said to his brother, "She has been like that all morning."

"You should go and talk to her." Shane answered.

"I know but something tells me that she doesn't want to talk." Nate said.

* * *

Caitlyn had been sitting by the table and suddenly she felt like the tears were on their ways. She fast excused herself and hurried to the cabin. As soon as she got there she collapsed on the bed and started to cry. Thinking that Nate maybe could be following her she walked to the bathroom and locked the door. She sat down on the floor and leaned her back against the wall hugging her knees. She buried her head in her knees and cried. She tried to cry out all her sadness but it seemed to be stuck inside her. After sitting there crying and thinking about old days in about 15 minutes she heard Nate entering the cabin. She stood up and washed her face, but her eyes were still red when she walked out of the bathroom.

Nate didn't say anything. All he did was embracing her in a tight hug. Caitlyn loved him for not asking - maybe he knew that he didn't want to know. That wasn't really possible. Only she knew.

"Baby are you okay?" He asked after a moment.

Caitlyn didn't answer. Nate loosened his grip around her and looked down at her. He gently touched her cheek and made her look at him.

In that moment Caitlyn wished she could tell him everything – but she couldn't.

As he looked into her eyes Nate could see the confusion and sadness behind them.

"Caity," Nate started, "You have to talk to me; I'm getting worried."

"Don't be." Caitlyn said shortly before she walked out of the cabin.

How did she think he could stop being worried? He was even more worried now.

* * *

Caitlyn started to walk and she didn't stop until she reached the point of the island. She sat down at the rocks and stared out into the water. She took out a little picture from her pocket. It was of the two of them. It was taking in one of those automates. She remembered that day. They had been taking so many photos. An old lady had been waiting for her turn in a very long time but they didn't care. Caitlyn had been hiding the photos in a little box with a lock on in her room. In that box she had everything he ever had been giving her. It was so easy. It was only the two of them and nobody knew. They had each other and nothing else mattered. So easy. No worries about what other people thought. Sharing everything with each other. But it wasn't easy anymore when that day came. She couldn't share anything with him anymore. Then she was all alone. In two weeks after she was almost never talking. Her mother thought that it was hormones. No one seemed to care. But she couldn't blame them. They didn't know. And she couldn't just tell them.

When she walked back to the cabin she decided that she didn't want Nate to be more worried so she putted on a smile and pretended to be happy. In the cabin Nate was talking to Jason and Shane.

"Hey guys." Caitlyn said as she opened the door and stuck her head in.

"Hey Caitlyn." Jason said and waved

"Can I come in or am I disturbing?" She asked

"You can come." Nate said with a smile.

"What are you talking about?" Caitlyn asked as she sat down on the bed beside Nate.

"You." Jason said and Nate and Shane both sent him warning glances.

After a short moment of awkward silence Shane said: "Jason let's go look at some birds."

"I just did, and by the way the look is great from the window you can just look from here." Jason answered. Shane sent him another warning look and stood up and dragged Jason out of the cabin.

"See you." He said on his way out. When they were out Nate and Caitlyn could still hear them.

"What was that for?" Jason asked confused.

"Giving Nate and Caitlyn a chance to talk." Shane said clear before he walked away.

Nate didn't know what to say. His brothers obviously wanted him to talk to Caitlyn but he wasn't sure if Caitlyn wanted to talk. And what was all the sudden happiness about?

"Soo…," Nate started, thinking of a way to start, "That song you were singing this morning.."

"Yea, what about that?" Caitlyn asked and looked at Nate.

"Did you write it yourself?" He asked.

"I did." Caitlyn answered.

"It was really good." Nate said

"Thanks." She answered.

After a moment of silence Nate asked: "What was it about?"

Caitlyn knew he was going to ask and she didn't know what to answer. It was about her feelings – she couldn't say that – and she guessed that he already knew.

"Not anything…special." She answered.

"Sure about that?" Nate asked "It sounded like you meant every word of it"

Of course. He knew everything about expressing yourself through music. Of course he didn't believe her.

"Yea." Caitlyn almost whispered.

"You're sure about that? Or you meant every word?" Nate asked not knowing what she had been answering.

Caitlyn didn't know what she had been answering either. She buried her head in her hands and said: "I don't want to talk about it."

"Caitlyn I'm here to help you," Nate said, "I can't stand seeing you like this – I love you."

"I love you too," Caitlyn whispered, "But you don't want to know this."

"I do Caity." Nate tried again.

"No you don't!" Caitlyn said raising her voice before running out of the cabin.

Nate lay back on the bed and closed his eyes. He didn't know what to do. He loved Caitlyn. She loved him too. What could be wrong? He didn't get it.

* * *

**I have a question for you readers****:**

**How is my English (grammar and spelling)? **

– **I'm asking this because I'm going to Scotland for a year to study, so this is also some kind of rehearsal for me. (btw English isn't my first language).. Please answer and tell me what you think of this chapter too. ;))**


	7. Turn Right

**AN****: I just came home from Italy and tomorrow I'm taking off to Barcelona! ;)) I didn't plan on updating before next Monday when I'm home again,, but I found some time. I wrote this on the road (sounds cool – like I'm on tour or something.. lol) and I had to explain over and over again what fanfiction is to my family and now they wanna check the side.. omg,, is all I got to say,, hope they don't find me! (btw why I changed my profile a bit – they wont know it's me. lol ;))**

**This chapter is kind of long,, couldn't stop myself, actually I planned it out much longer but I will save that for the next chapter.**

**FYI t****his and the last two chapters are on the same day,, just if you missed it or something..:))**

* * *

Nate lay on the bed and thought until it was time for dinner. He finally thought of an idea to make Caitlyn talk to him. Nate hurried down to the restaurant to be there before everyone else. Then he walked to the bar to talk to the owner of the restaurant. The guy from the first night was standing in the bar as Nate talked to the owner. He kept sending evil glances at Nate.

* * *

Caitlyn was at the beach lying in the hammock. She was thinking too. But opposite Nate she didn't know what to do. She needed someone to save her but she wasn't sure if she knew the right person to do that. Nate had been trying, - she knew, but it didn't seem right.

When it was time for dinner Caitlyn stood up and walked to the restaurant. She sat at their usual table, waiting for everyone else to show up. Suddenly the guy from the bar stood beside her.

"I have noticed you do not look as happy as usual." The guy said on his bad English.

Caitlyn just looked at him without answering. She didn't know what to say; - she couldn't just burst out the reason to a stranger.

"If you want to talk I will be around." He said after a moment of silence.

Caitlyn just slightly nodded. She actually felt like telling him right there. It could be so easy. He didn't have any relations to her, and she was probably never going to see him again.

* * *

As Nate was done talking to the owner he looked around to see if anyone was there yet. His eyes stopped when he saw Caitlyn talking to the guy from the bar. A weird feeling of jealousy shot through him. When he walked to the table the guy looked at him with an innocent look on his face before walking back to the bar.

"Hey." Caitlyn said as Nate sat down beside her.

"Hey, what did he want?" Nate asked, clearly showing of his jealousy.

"I really don't know," Caitlyn lied, "his English is really bad."

"Hmm.. okay." Nate said and smiled.

Soon everyone else were there eating. Under the whole dinner there was a strange distance between Nate and Caitlyn even though they were sitting right beside each other.

When they finished the dinner music started playing and soon a lot of people started dancing. Soon only Nate, Caitlyn, Shane and Jason were at the table. Their parents were dancing and Ryan was talking to his new friend. There was an awkward silence between them and after some minutes Jason and Shane decided to go and find someone to dance with. Right after Nate stood up too.

"Where are you going?" Caitlyn asked finally speaking.

"The bathroom…" Nate said with a nervous smile.

Caitlyn just nodded in response. She rested her head in her hand as she sat at the table all alone. It seemed like everyone were escaping from her. They probably didn't know what to say to her. As she looked around the restaurant the guy in the bar caught her eyes. He sent her a pity look and she smiled back at him. Maybe he was her saver. She decided to give it a shot later. Just talking to him. He would probably not be interested in her after she had poured out her deepest thoughts to him anyway. Then she could be with Nate and be happy. Maybe that would be to use the guy. But she loved Nate and was staying with him no matter what.

Caitlyn's attention was suddenly turned to the small stage. A well known voice was speaking in the mic. Nate's voice. Wasn't he supposed to be in the bathroom?

"We want to play a new song for you," Nate said, "I just wrote it yesterday, and I hope you all like it." As he talked he looked straight into Caitlyn's eyes. He stood on the stage together with Shane and Jason and soon he started to play his guitar.

_Pick up all your tears  
__Throw 'em in your back seat  
__Leave without a second glance  
__Somehow I'm to blame  
__For this never-ending racetrack you call life._

_Just turn right  
__Into my arms  
__Turn right  
__You won't be alone  
__You might fall off this track sometime  
__Hope to see you on the finish line_

_You're driving all your friends out  
__You just be, you cannot follow  
__And soon you will be on your own  
__Somehow I'm to blame  
__For this never-ending racetrack you call life_

_Just turn right  
__Into my arms  
__Turn right  
__You won't be alone  
__You might fall off this track sometime  
__Hope to see you on the finish line_

_I did all I could  
__I gave everything  
__But you had to go your way  
__And that road was not for me_

_So turn right  
__Into my arms  
__Turn right  
__You won't be alone  
__You might fall off this track sometime  
__Hope to see you on the finish line_

Nate kept looking straight into Caitlyn's eyes while singing the whole song. At the moment the song ended Caitlyn had forgot all about the guy in the bar. She was going to tell Nate what was on her mind – what was making her fell down.

As Connect 3 was done singing the song they made their way back to the table. Nate sat down on the chair beside Caitlyn and she took his hand and squeezed it. She didn't look up. She was deep in thoughts of what she should tell him.

As Nate felt the light squeeze of Caitlyn's hand under the table a little smile grew on his face. He knew that the song had helped. She was probably finally understanding that he really wanted to talk to her and wanted her to feel better, no matter what she had to say.

As the dinner was over everyone started to walk to their cabins. Nate and Caitlyn walked hand in hand but they hadn't said a word to each other since Connect 3 had played the song at the restaurant. As they were near to their cabin Caitlyn pulled Nate the other way.

"Where are we going?" He asked confused.

"For a walk." Caitlyn answered shortly without looking up. She thought that it might be easier to talk outside in the dark so she could hide her face a bit.

Caitlyn was still deep in thoughts, as she led Nate to the beach. They still didn't say anything. Nate knew that Caitlyn needed time to think, so he waited for her to speak.

After a little while Caitlyn broke the silence.

"Nate, I'm sorry for not talking to you," She said still looking down, "It's not like it's such a big deal… but the thing is I never told this to anyone."

Caitlyn stopped walking and Nate walked in front of her lifting her head up to look at him.

"It's okay," He said, "No matter how big it is to anyone else I can tell it's important to you, and I want to listen no matter what you got to say."

"Okay." Caitlyn sighed, "But first; you have to kiss me.. I feel like it's been a while."

A huge smile grew on Nate's face and he let out a small laugh before leaning down and giving Caitlyn a passionate kiss on the lips.

As they pulled apart he said; "Yes it's been a while."

Nate took Caitlyn's hand and they continued the walking.

"Okay," Caitlyn said and took a deep breath, "Remember that it's not only you I kept this from, it's everyone."

"Sure." Nate said waiting for Caitlyn to continue.

"Last year," Caitlyn started, "I had a boyfriend. We kind of kept our relationship secret. No one knew. Not my family, not his family, not my friends – only we knew."

Caitlyn looked up at Nate. He was just starring out into the dark. She wished she could see his face – just a reaction.

Nate decided not to interrupt Caitlyn as she finally began to speak. She was looking at the ground while talking and he thought that it maybe would be easier for her if he didn't look at her. Nate wanted to be a great listener and he wanted to help her, so he tried to pretend like he was just her best friend who wouldn't bother to hear about her ex.

"Nate?" Caitlyn suddenly said.

Nate turned his head and said; "I'm listening," with a smile.

"I had a great time and was happy, and I didn't have to think about what other people thought 'cause they didn't know." Caitlyn continued, "But then one day he found out he had cancer. And a week later he just died." She whispered the last part. It was strange to say it out loud. It had always just been a loud voice inside her head. Now she felt like she was opening a door into her mind.

"Today it's a year ago he died." Caitlyn said, "After his death I was all alone with the sorrow. No one knew that I knew him. And it was too late to tell" Soon Caitlyn could feel the relief of saying it all out loud.

"I was feeling down in weeks after but I still didn't tell anyone. Then I decided to try and forget. But I just can't seem to." Caitlyn said, "When I met you it became a bit easier. I started to remind myself that if he hadn't died I would maybe still be with him and I wouldn't be with you. Maybe it was meant to happen so I could meet you."

Nate still looked straight in front of him. A smile grew on his face when Caitlyn started to talk about him. Suddenly Caitlyn stopped walking and turned to Nate who looked down at her.

"I want you to know that I love you more than I ever loved him," Caitlyn said, "But it still feels like I lost a very close friend."

"Of course," Nate said understanding, "of course it makes you sad."

"It's just… my problem right now is that I still feel the sorrow I felt when he died. I thought it would go away with time but it didn't. And I really don't know what to do to make it go away." Caitlyn said with a lower voice. She could feel the tears coming.

"Hey," Nate said and lifted her head close to his, "It's going to be okay, I promise." Then he engulfed her in a tight hug and Caitlyn let the tears flow.

Nate actually didn't know how it was going to be okay but he just promised Caitlyn it would and he hoped he could keep his promise.

* * *

Both Nate and Caitlyn had a sleepless night. Nate was thinking about how he could make Caitlyn feel better. It was very complicated. He hadn't thought it was something like that Caitlyn was going to tell him. But he was very happy that she still loved him and that he now knew it didn't really have anything to do with their relationship.

Caitlyn couldn't seem to stop the thoughts either. She thought about old days and now and once in a while she cried a silent cry.

* * *

**Not really sure if I liked this chapter ,, kind of rushed??.. hmm.. don't know.. Let me know what you think.. ;))**

**REVIEW!!- they keep me going ;)**


	8. A Morning Talk

**AN: I'm so so sorry I'm first updating know! forgive me.. but I just felt like witing something else for a moment.. so go check out my one-shot "Me, My Guitar And My Piano" ! ;)  
I may be writing more to it anyway,, a reviewer got me pumped! lol.,, ;)) but I would really like to get this story done before I go to Scotland cause I wont have so much time writing over there., I think,. **

**This may sound a bit like a filler,, but Caitlyn and I just want you and Nate to know everything before we continue! ;))**

**But anyways hope you all like it!!! and review people! ;P**

* * *

Caitlyn waked up at 6 am. She obviously did have had a bit of sleep. She heard the water running in the bathroom and noticed Nate wasn't by her side. Of course, no matter how early she woke up Nate was always first, she thought with a smile. She really loved that curly haired boy. And luckily he loved her too. She hadn't thought that he would feel the same way about her after she had told him that she was still thinking about her ex. But she had been wrong. It was such a release that she finally told someone. A part of the sorrow had been lifted from her heart. But she was still sad, and didn't know what to do to get all happy again. Maybe she wasn't going to be all happy again. Nate had promised her that she would be better. Could she trust him? She could. But… was he really sure he could make her feel better? Caitlyn pulled the duvet up between her ears and tried to make all the bad thoughts go away.

* * *

Nate felt the hot water fall down over his body. He ran his fingers through his hair and leaned the back of his head against the wall. He closed his eyes. He was tired but he couldn't stop the thoughts in his head. The night had been terrible. When he finally after hours fell asleep he had night mares. First one when he and Caitlyn were at the beach and she was going to tell him what was bothering her. She ended up breaking up with him. Nate had been waking up shaking and for a moment he thought that the dream was actually what had happened. But then he turned around and saw Caitlyn sleeping beside him and he remembered what she had told him. When he finally drifted off to sleep again he saw Caitlyn having fun with another guy. Nate didn't know who it was but it wasn't him. The scene kept changing but all the time Caitlyn was laughing her beautiful laugh and she was happy. Happy with someone else.

The steam now filled the bathroom and Nate felt extremely hot. He turned off the hot water and turned on the cold. He wasn't sure how to help Caitlyn. He really wanted to – he did promise her – but he didn't think he was able to do anything. It wasn't enough to hold her and kiss her and tell her that everything was going to be okay. He had been doing that all the time and she was still not feeling well. He hadn't expected it to be something like that she was hiding. He thought that it actually would get better if she just told him. He thought that he could make her feel better. But now they were just two who didn't know what to do.

* * *

As Nate walked out of the bathroom he couldn't see Caitlyn in the bed. But when he stepped closer he noticed her messy hair under the duvet. The sight made him smile. He lay down beside her only with a towel around his waist and moved the duvet so he could see her face. When he leaned down and kissed her cheek her eyes shot open and a smile grew on her face.

"Good morning." Nate said with a smile.

"Morning." Caitlyn said and noticed Nate wasn't wearing anything but a towel. She placed one hand around his neck and the other on his chest and soon they were in a heavy make-out session. It had been a while since they had done that and it felt so right. When they pulled apart for air Nate said: "So how are you feeling today?" Caitlyn knew what he was thinking about.

"You know…yesterday when you sang that song I really thought that I was going to feel so happy after telling you,, but it seems like there's so much more to it." Caitlyn said with a sigh.

"Yea," Nate said shortly kissing Caitlyn on the forehead. After a moment of silence he asked; "Caitlyn,, why exactly didn't you tell your friends and family that you had a boyfriend?"

"I guess it was because it seemed so strange to me. I mean he was my first and… My parents thought that it was odd that I didn't have a boyfriend like everyone else in my age, and I just always told them that boys were ridiculous and that I didn't need them or something like that. But truth to be told I was just jealous at everyone else who could get a boyfriend. It was the same with my friends. I was nothing compared with them. I was just the geek hanging out with the popular girls. I guess I could have showed them that I could do just as good as them, by telling them about him… but I was scared I think… I don't know.. but I ended to decide that not telling them would be the best. The people who had been making me feel so different and miserable were not allowed to know how happy I was."

"I thought you liked your friends," Nate said after a moment, "And your parents."

"I do, it's just.. I mean,, they were nice to me, but I wasn't one of them. They did stuff without me only because they didn't think I wanted to do the things they did. They thought I was different. They thought I hated shopping and girly stuff, only because all the boys at school only saw me as a friend,, until I met you people have always assumed that I was a boyish girl, but deep inside I wasn't," Caitlyn said, "I guess you made me open myself and show people who I am and who I want to be, but my friends just say; 'finally a boy came along and changed her into a girl.' It is kind of hard to hear as I always has been like this I have just been hiding it."

Nate looked really thoughtful when she stopped talking. After a moment he looked Caitlyn in the eyes and kissed her cheek.

"I really didn't know you felt like this.." Nate said as he embraced her in a hug, "But I have one more question; did you have any problems telling your friends and family about me? – I mean it must still have been strange cause to them I was your first."

"After what happened I promised myself that I would never make that mistake again not telling people about a relationship like that. It might sound really stupid, but with you I could do much better than my friends. I mean they had never dated a famous rockstar. And I think that it made me feel special instead of different so it wasn't that hard to tell them. They focussed more on the fact that you were famous than everything else. To me it's not like it means anything that you are famous, but as long as my friends were amazed it was cool." Caitlyn said, - the last part with a smile.

"I love you Caitlyn Gellar." Nate said with a smile and kissed her lips.

"I love you too, but I think it's time to get out of bed – you know, we're going home today."

"Yea you're probably right." Nate said and kissed her one last time.

* * *

**Aahh,, I missed those Naitlyn kissing moments.. ! ;) lol **

**REVIEW PEOPLE!! - then you're the nicest!! :)) and go check out "ME, MY GUITAR AND MY PIANO" (fyi it is a naitlyn,, kind of,, but not anti-naitlyn!)**

**"The man who can't be moved" That song is genius !! (listening to it right now. ;).)**


	9. Home Sweet Home

**AN: I finally pulled myself together to write the next chapter.! I'm sorry I didn't do it before,, but I missed some reviews for the last chapter. :'( They really make a big difference! (Me writing or not writing) ****hmm,, but hope you like it! and please review! :))**

**As for my story: 'Can I have a word with you? - Or three?' I have the last chapter ready, I just need 1 more review and then I will update! Wanna be the lucky 1 reviewer that makes me update? -go and review!! :))**

* * *

"Caitlyn, Caity.." Caitlyn heard Nate say as she opened her eyes.

"It was just a dream." Nate said as he rubbed her back.

Caitlyn kept dreaming about him. She experienced that day over and over again in her head. From the last day she saw him; lying in a hospital bed, with a pale face, till the text message she received, where his parents were telling that he was gone. It was a true nightmare.

At the moment they were sitting in the plane on their way to New York. Back home. Back to the crazy fans and the paparazzis. Back to friends who didn't really knew or understood Caitlyn. They thought they did, but they didn't. Caitlyn had promised herself that she was going to be more open to her friends. But she wasn't going to tell them about the past. It was going to stay between her and Nate. It was too late to tell her parents and people who knew her when it all happened.

Suddenly Nate, who sat beside her, grabbed her hand. Caitlyn looked up at him and smiled, before leaning her head on his shoulder. She knew that she had Nate to support her. And she was sure he could help her.

Nate was also more positive today. He was surer that he could help Caitlyn now. Now he finally felt okay about promising her that everything was going to be okay. He was happy that Caitlyn had been opening up to him. She had told him a lot of things she didn't even told people she had known her whole life. He knew she trusted him.

"So you two are going strong again?" Shane asked as he turned around from the seat in front of Nate and Caitlyn's.

Nate looked down at Caitlyn and smiled before saying: "Yes, we are."

"Good," Shane said with a smile, "You look cutest together."

Nate rolled his eyes at his brother.

Soon Caitlyn fell asleep on Nate's shoulder. She felt safe in his arms and no nightmares were disturbing her.

Nate woke her up a couple of hours later. They were soon going to land in New York.

It had been a long day. First they had been sailing in a little boat from the small island to the mainland. Then they had to fly 5 hours to New York. **(AN: I just made that up!)**

After taking a taxi home from the airport, the time was 5 pm.

Caitlyn thought that it was nice to come home to her own room. As soon as she walked in she dropped her luggage on the floor and dumped down onto her bed. She thought about the vacation. It had been great, but strange too. She had had some black days, but it had led to a stronger bond between her and Nate. Caitlyn reached her hand down into one of her bags and took out the small picture of her past. She didn't know what to do with it. It reminded her of something bad she wanted to forget. But wasn't it wrong to just try and forget. She hoped that one day she could look at the picture and smile. And be happy. She hoped that the memories she once made with him would make her smile. That she would remember him and their time together and forget what happened. But she knew it wasn't that easy. She had to get rid of the black days and the nightmares first. But she had no idea how. As on cue her phone started ringing.

"It's Caitlyn." She said with a tired voice.

"It's Nate," He said, "I thought about something."

"Yea," Caitlyn said, "What?"

"When you were sleeping in the plane I thought about how to make you feel better. Honestly it's very hard. But I figured that I might not be the right person to help you." Nate said.

"What do you mean?" Caitlyn asked confused. She had been trusting Nate. And thought that Nate was going to save her from the thoughts. Maybe she had been naive to actually think he could do it.

"You know…, I know how you feel, but then again I don't really know, cause I haven't tried anything like that. But maybe you should find someone who has been through the same thing," Nate explained, "I think you should try and find that guy's parents, or maybe someone else who knew him."

Caitlyn thought about this for a moment.

"I don't know…" She hesitated

"It can really help you Caity," Nate said, "And maybe they will be happy to hear that their son was happy with you in his last months."

Caitlyn knew Nate was right. But considering how hard it was for her to tell Nate, it was going to be harder to tell them.

"I don't even know who they are," Caitlyn said, "And how am I going to find them?"

"You know where they live right?" Nate said.

"Yea.. But what if they moved?" Caitlyn asked trying to get Nate to agree with her on that it was a bad idea.

"You can check it on the internet, you do know their last name right?" Nate asked trying to convince Caitlyn that it was a good idea.

"Yes I do… but do you want me to just knock on their door and say: 'did your son die last year?'?" Caitlyn asked.

"Well maybe you could say something else...," Nate tried, "But just think about it. And don't worry; I will be here no matter what you choose."

This made Caitlyn smile. She knew she could count on Nate in the end. He was just trying to help the best way he could.

"I will think about it," Caitlyn said, "And Nate.."

"Yea?" Nate said

"Thank you," Caitlyn said, "For being here for me."

"It's a pleasure," Nate said, "And I'm here for those I love."

"You know… I actually didn't think you would be like this when I told you," Caitlyn said, "I guess I learned that you're just perfect for me."

"I will always be there for you Caitlyn," Nate said sincerely, "I would do anything not to loose you."

"I love you Nate." Caitlyn said with a smile.

That night Caitlyn had a peaceful and dreamless sleep.

* * *

**Please review and tell me what you think! :)**

**I'm considering continuing 'Me, My Guitar and My Piano',, but do you think I should do it? I have an idea for a new story (also Naitlyn), and I got that one more planned out.  
****- which one should I go for? (I will complete this story first)**

**REVIEW! :)) - then you're the best!**

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	10. The Traffic In My Head

**AN: So yea,, here's the next chapter.. :) I wasn't too happy about the last chapter myself,, so I will try and make up for it in this chapter,, and I think it turned out really well actually. :) So please review and tell me what you think,, and why.. :))**

**Now I think I will go and update; 'Can I Have A Word With You?- Or Three?' I can't wait for the last review ... hehe ... **

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As Caitlyn walked down the street with her dad's guitar on the back, she looked up at the sun. It was shining like there was no tomorrow. Caitlyn had always loved the summer. Especially when she was younger; whenever she was feeling down she just looked to the sky, trying to find the sun. In the summer it was easy and it made her so happy. She had always thought that the sun was amazing; it could bright up the darkest day and it could bright up her thoughts. Once she had been starring at the sun, trying to understand how it could be so great. But her mom had strictly told her not to look at it. But Caitlyn couldn't help it. She was dragged by the sun. She couldn't stop being amazed.

Caitlyn smiled at the thought about her younger days. When she was a kid she didn't worry about a thing. She didn't worry about the future. She didn't worry about if she was going to ruin her eyes by looking at the sun. It was all about that moment and that feeling she got by looking at it. Caitlyn wanted to be like that again. Live with no worries.

The iron gate creaked when she opened it. The sun disappeared behind the only cloud in the sky as she walked in to the churchyard. She had only been there once before. A week after his death, she was there. She still remembered where he lay. She walked down a small path between the graves. Each of them were surrounded by a nice little hedge, which was very well cut. It must have been taken some time to cut them Caitlyn thought as she walked further down the path. As she reached the end of path she stopped with the last grave.

The gold script on the stone was still clear and shiny. It felt like it was more than a year ago Caitlyn had been there the last time. So much had happened on that year.

She placed the rose she had been bringing beside the gravestone and sat down at the bench in front of the grave. She putted down the guitar and took a little box out from the side of the bag. She hadn't opened it in a very long time. It was the box with all their memories. She reached down into her pocket and took out the small key.

She slowly opened the box. It was full of pictures. Some taken in a photo automate. There was also a postcard. He had sent it to her on a vacation to Europe. Under the pictures Caitlyn found a necklace with a little purple stone in. He had been giving it to her. She remembered she had been taking it off the day he died. Now she opened it and replaced it back around her neck.

Caitlyn took one of the pictures out of the box. They were both in it. She was kissing his cheek and he was smiling a warm smile. She had her arms around his neck.

Caitlyn placed the picture beside the rose. Then he would know it was from her. She looked at the sky as a tear ran down her cheek. The sun finally showed itself again escaping from the cloud. As it shone on Caitlyn's face she could feel it's warm. It was like it dried the tear away.

Suddenly she heard steps on the path. She looked down from the sky and saw that it was the gardener. He smiled at her as he stopped at a grave and started to remove the old flowers. The grave was full of flowers and wreaths which were all dead. The person did probably just die. Maybe it was a week ago, or two. There was a lot to remove for the gardener. Caitlyn wondered what it would be like to have a job like him. To walk around in the churchyard kind of serving the death. And if he met any people alive, they were all sad because they had lost someone. And he was still smiling. Maybe it was the sun, - that made him smile. Caitlyn smiled at the thought. The sun was a wonder.

She looked down at the box in her hands. Did he have a box like her too? She didn't know. But she knew that he had the pictures too. Where were they now? Maybe his parents had found them? They probably had. Maybe they did want to meet her. Maybe Nate was right.

Caitlyn closed the box and placed the small lock back on it. She placed the box back down in the bag, and took out the guitar. She maked sure the gardener was gone before she started to strum it. She had been playing on her dad's guitar in a couple of years, without him or anyone knowing. Maybe it was time for her to be a more open person. To let people know her dreams. She started to play a song she had been writing about a month after he died.

_This is the third time this week  
that I find myself wandering down your street –  
__and I can't seem to give it up.  
I've even stopped making these excuses for why  
__you're stuck here in my thoughts when it's been long enough.  
__I try to keep myself moving, but I'm not going anywhere.._

_I wait in the same spot  
brain like a parking lot  
you're the traffic in my head  
you're the reason that I'm wrecked  
I pray for it to stop  
like rain on the sidewalk  
traffic in my head  
you're the traffic in my head  
there's just too much to forget_

guess I should be happy now  
everything is back to how it was  
before you came around  
I'm already changing  
I've even tried to find a new distraction  
but still you surround  
as if it's not hard enough  
I try to keep myself moving but I'm not going anywhere

I wait in the same spot  
brain like a parking lot  
you're the traffic in my head  
you're the reason that I'm wrecked  
I pray for it to stop  
like rain on the sidewalk  
traffic in my head  
you're the traffic in my head  
there's just too much to forget

a part of me thinks that I'm going crazy  
the world's spinning  
my vision is hazy  
and none of this makes any sense  
I never meant for this to end  
I can do what I have to do..  
if I could only get around you

_I wait in the same spot  
brain like a parking lot  
you're the traffic in my head  
you're the reason that I'm wrecked  
I pray for it to stop  
like rain on the sidewalk  
traffic in my head  
you're the traffic in my head  
there's just too much to forget_

When the song was done Caitlyn looked down at the gravestone in front of her. She hoped that he could hear her. So he knew she was still thinking of him. The tears started to run down her cheeks. She hugged her knees and buried her face in her hands while she let the tears run.

After about 5 minutes she suddenly stopped crying. It was like there weren't any tears left in her. It felt relieving.

Maybe she should contact his parents. She took out her Iphone and turned on the internet. She searched for his address. They were still living there. Unless someone with the same last name had moved in. There was also a phone number. Maybe she could call them before she just walked by. Maybe they were trying to forget what happened, and didn't want to be reminded. Calling them would probably be the best.

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**The ending sucked - I know! ,, but did the rest suck too?? - let me know! ;) REVIEW! **

**PS: Go and read: 'Can I Have A Word With You? - Or Three?' !! I'm uploading the last chapter in a minute!! Btw, it's Naitlyn, (a good reason to read!) :))**

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	11. Doorsteps to Climb

**AN: Hey there!! ;) - Sorry I'm so late, but I arrived to Scotland this sunday and I just had to settle in with a new family, new friends and a huge new school. And that's all in English which makes it a bit harder.. ;) I don't think I will update more than about 1 or maybe 2 chapters in a week (for any of my stories) in the future. (Can't sit at my computer all the time! - I'm here to experience!) :))**

**But I hope you enjoy this,, and I know it isn't that long,, but I just felt like ending it there ;P - you'll probably don't like that.. hehe - Cliffy,... **

**But (again) Review!! folks.. (that's what my English teacher says All the time!) ;D**

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As the dial-tone went off the second time, Caitlyn fast removed the phone from her ear and hung up. It wasn't the first time. She dumped down on her bed and buried her face in the pillows. Why was this so hard? She had been calling three times convinced that this was it, but when she heard the dial-tone she just refused. They probably thought that she was playing some kind of prank on them.

Caitlyn grabbed the phone again and dialled Nate's number.

"Hey baby." He greeted her as he picked up the phone.

"Hey." Caitlyn answered not as excited as Nate.

"What's up?" Nate asked a bit concerned.

"I've been trying to call his parents the last couple of hours, but it's just not working!" Caitlyn exclaimed.

"Why isn't it working?" Nate asked.

"It's just… I just can't bring myself to do it." Caitlyn said with a sad voice.

"It can be hard in the moment they're picking up the phone, but when it's done it's all going to be good," Nate said immediately turning into Dr. Phil, "You just have to pass that small doorstep and then you'll be happy you called."

"You make it sounds so easy," Caitlyn sighed, "The so called doorstep is very high and difficult to climb for me.

"Yea, I know…" Nate said turning back to Nate, "But you just have to try. You know I'll be there no matter what happens."

"Thanks." Was all Caitlyn could say.

"Do you want me to come over and hold your hand while you do the call?" Nate asked.

Caitlyn smiled and said: "I think I'll be okay."

"Okay, that's good, so go and make that call." Nate said with a smile.

"Yes, I'll do that." Caitlyn answered and hung up.

She could have been talking to Nate for hours, but she had to get back to reality. She looked down at the phone in her hand and sighed. She had to do this. For her own fault. She dialled their number for the fourth time and placed the phone by her ear. This was going to be her last try. She had to do it now, she couldn't hang up.

As the dial-tone came on Caitlyn wished that they weren't at home. But then again she would have to try another time. If she could just get over this doorstep as fast as possible it would probably be the best.

"Hello, it's Alice." A thin woman voice said.

As she heard the woman's voice Caitlyn couldn't speak. She had suddenly forgotten what she should say. She had planned it all out and she had been rehearsing in front of the mirror but now she didn't say anything. She couldn't say anything.

"Hello, is anybody there?" The woman said.

Caitlyn's voice was still out of order.

"Is this some kind of prank?" The woman continued.

As there was still no answer she said; "If you call again I will call the police."

"Wait!" Caitlyn suddenly said as the woman was on her way to hung up.

"What?" The woman asked again, "Look I really don't got time for this, if you have anything important to say then spit it out."

"Umm," Caitlyn said, her voice just started working again, "Are you Alex's mother?"

There was nothing but silence in the other end for a moment.

"Yes," The woman said slowly and with a lower voice, "But he doesn't live here anymore."

"I know." Caitlyn said shortly, "I wasn't searching for him I was searching for you."

"Do I know you?" The woman asked a bit confused.

"No," Caitlyn said, "And that's a mistake I want to change."

Caitlyn could just feel the relief of being on the other side of the doorstep.

After 15 minutes Caitlyn hung up with a smile on her face. Alice, his mother, had been happy to hear that Caitlyn was one of Alex's friends and that she wanted to meet her. She had been inviting Caitlyn to her house.

* * *

Caitlyn was proud of herself. She had finally talked to his mother and it felt so relieving.

She stood in front of Nate's door and as soon as she knocked on the door Nate was their opening it.

"Hey," Caitlyn said with a smile, "Do you have time for me?"

Nate smiled back at her. She was obviously happy.

"Caity honey, I'll always have time for you." Nate said and motioned for her to walk in.

"Watch what you're promising," Caitlyn said with a smirk, "You are a rockstar. Remember?"

"Yea, I totally forgot…" Nate said joking, "No I didn't… You know Caitlyn I would cancel any interview, concert or whatever if you needed to see me."

Caitlyn laughed a bit as she walked up the stairs with Nate. She sighed and said: "I really love you Nate."

Nate smiled at her and said: "I really love you too," as they walked into his room.

Once he had closed the door Nate put his arm around Caitlyn and gave her a hug.

"So how did it go?" He asked after kissing her forehead.

"Good," Caitlyn said with a smile, "I'm going to meet up with his mother tomorrow."

"That's good," Nate said sincerely, "So how did she react to the fact that her son had a secret girlfriend?"

"Hmm,, I haven't really told her yet," Caitlyn said, "I just said that I was a friend of him."

"Oh," Nate said, "I almost forgot.. I have some news.."

"What news?" Caitlyn said getting very curious.

"You are so curious." Nate said with a laugh.

"Tell me!" Caitlyn exclaimed.

"Okay" Nate said, "But first; are you ready to climb another doorstep?"

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**Just wanted to add that this is officially my longest story!! ;) yay me! lol..-..**

**Review folks,, ! then you're loved!! :)**

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	12. More Doorsteps?

**AN: I'm so so sorry I haven't updated in a weeks! - But so much is happening and the weeks are flying!  
I hope you like this chapter and please, please review and tell me what you think. :)) - The reviews makes me write, and the lack of same has made me not write! It doesn't have to be something long and analysing, just a couple of words makes me happy .. - but long reviews are deff appreciated too! :)**

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"_Tell me!" Caitlyn exclaimed._

"_Okay" Nate said, "But first; are you ready to climb another doorstep?" _

Caitlyn's smile dropped as she heard this. She hadn't thought that the news were about her.

"I don't know," Caitlyn said after a moment, "tell me first."

"Okay," Nate said, "I want you to sing at our next concert."

Caitlyn just sat there starring at Nate. Had she heard him right? Did he really want her to sing in front of an audience? – In front of Connect 3's audience? That was a huge audience!

"No Nate, I can't do that." Caitlyn said.

"Come on Cait, you're such a fantastic singer." Nate said with a smile.

"Nate, I can't." Caitlyn said again, "Not in front of people."

"Why not?" Nate said sounding a bit disappointed, "I mean it's just fans; they practically love everything I love… and I love you."

Caitlyn smiled and leaned closer into Nate.

"It's just… it's not only fans, it's also everyone else, like my parents." Caitlyn said.

Nate lifted her head so she looked into his eyes.

"Caity, you have to be more open," Nate said, "you can't hide yourself like that. You have to live the way you want to, and not think about what other people think. I honestly always thought that I knew everything about you, but I guess you have been hiding the real Caitlyn in there."

Caitlyn didn't know what to say. She just kept starring into his eyes. He was right. She had been promising herself to be more open. To her friends, to her parents – to everyone, but it seemed to be harder than she had thought. Maybe she should just go for it. But… what if her friends didn't like the real Caitlyn?

"Caitlyn, honey?" Nate said as he cupped her cheeks.

"Nate, I guess the real Caitlyn isn't as brave as the former Caitlyn." Caitlyn said.

"Caity, you have to brave," Nate said, "Cause I already arranged it all."

"What?!" Caitlyn said

"Sorry Cait, but I kind of knew that you would need a push." Nate said, "Please just do it, for your own best. I'll be there for you."

Caitlyn looked into Nate's eyes. He sincerely meant it. She could see that. She smiled and kissed his perfect soft lips.

"Okay." She said with a small smile.

* * *

Caitlyn's heart was beating fast as she walked down his street – or not really his street anymore. As she lifted her hand to remove a strain of hair from her eyes she noticed that her palms were all sweaty. She stopped walking to calm herself down. She inhaled a big amount of the slightly cold, fresh morning-air.

She had nothing to fear – why was she this nervous? She started to walk again, now more calmed down. As she turned around a corner and saw the house, she immediately stopped. What was she doing there? She hadn't even thought about what she was going to tell his mother.

Caitlyn started to walk again, but this time very slowly. It was like something was dragging her to the house and something else was trying to drag her the other way. Before she knew it she stood in front of the door. In a moment she considered to just turn around and run away. But then she remembered how relieved she had been feeling the day before – after calling Alice. Maybe this was just another doorstep to climb for her – well technically it was a doorstep.

Caitlyn sighed deep before she took a step towards the door and rang the doorbell.

She didn't wait long until the door got opened by a tall slim woman. Her hair was long and blonde. Caitlyn could see the wrinkles which were starting to form around her eyes and her mouth – but that was the only thing that showed that she wasn't twenty.

"Hi, you must be Caitlyn." The woman said with a wide smile.

Caitlyn already felt much better. She felt like Alice really had been looking forward to meeting her.

"Yes, I am." Caitlyn said with a smile.

"I'm Alice. Come in." The woman said and motioned for Caitlyn to walk into her home.

The house was precisely as Caitlyn remembered it. Small and comfortable. Alice showed her to the living room and told her to sit down in one of the couches.

Caitlyn looked around the room as she sat in the soft couch. There were a lot of photos on the walls – more that she remembered. She noticed that most of them were of him. There were some from when he was just a baby – she had seen them before, and some from when he was older. As she looked more and more at the photos she noticed that it showed most of his life. If you stood in the middle of the room and turned around, you would see him get older and older.

Caitlyn got an odd feeling inside as she watched the photos. He looked so happy on all of them – it made her happy too, but at the same time the memory of him just got clearer by watching them, and she felt sad.

"You know I thought it might be you." Alice said as she walked into the room with a tray in her hands.

Caitlyn looked confused at her and said; "What do you mean?"

Alice put the tray down at the small coffee-table and poured some tea in two cups. She walked to the other side of the room and took something from a small drawer before coming back and sitting down beside Caitlyn.

It was a small photo she had in her hands. She showed it to Caitlyn.

As Caitlyn saw that she was in the photo, she stopped breathing for a moment. She just starred at the photo in Alice's hand. It was one of them from the photo automate. Of course they had found them.

"You know I have always wanted to get to know you," Alice said after a moment of silence, "I think you made my son very happy."

Caitlyn didn't know what to say, but a small smile crept on her face. After a moment of more silence she said: "Everyday, I regret that I didn't get to know you before," Caitlyn said, "That's why I'm here today."

"Weeks after he died, I was broken," Alice said, kind of changing the subject, but not, "But then I told myself to remember my amazing son and tell everyone about him. I still feel very sad sometimes, but mostly when I think about him it makes me happy."

"How did you manage to feel like that?" Caitlyn asked. She really wanted to be able to do the same thing herself.

"I talked to people, and got all my thoughts out," Alice said, "I leaned on the people who felt the same as me – we leaned on each other. I think that it helped me that I had someone else going trough the same thing as I was."

Caitlyn looked down. "I'm all alone." She shortly said, "I have been all the time, I mean no one knew that I knew him."

"You have me now." Alice said with a smile, "Now take a cup of tea, and tell me everything."

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**REVIEW! **- **please :))**

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	13. It All Ends With A New Start

**AN: Sorry I haven't updated in a while, but I honestly didn't feel like it.. I think I lost a lot of readers or at least people stopped reviewing.. So I descided to write the last chapter. **

**I really hope that you will review and tell me what you thought about the whole story.. :)**

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Caitlyn felt the warm sunlight on her face and opened her eyes to a beautiful morning. A smile crept on her face as she turned her heads to see a sleepy Nate. His arm was heavily lying across her waist. She moved closer to him and buried her head in his chest. She was so happy. As she lay there she realized that she wasn't just happy, but blessed by having Nate. She closed her eyes and breathed in his smell.

The last couple of weeks had been great. After talking to Alice everything had lit up. Caitlyn had been meeting Alice for a coffee in town a couple of times and she had introduced her to some of Alex's old friends. They had all been very friendly to her and wanted to know everything about her and Alex's relationship. Alice was right; if she talked to people about all the good times she was able to stay positive and be happy when she thought back at him.

Everyday she got happier and happier, and her relationship with Nate grew stronger and stronger. He had been there for her all the time and she knew that he would do anything to keep her. He was always there if she needed to cry for Alex.

Caitlyn felt Nate move beside her and turned her head to look at him. He was slowly waking up to see a smiling Caitlyn.

Nate couldn't help but smile as he saw Caitlyn. She was looking at him with the most beautiful smile on her face.

"Good Morning beautiful." Nate said as he kissed Caitlyn's forehead.

"Morning." Caitlyn said as he snuggled into Nate's chest again.

He put his arms around her and buried his face in her soft curls.

"How are you feeling today?" Nate asked after a moment.

"Good," Caitlyn said and moved so she looked at Nate, "Very good, but a bit nervous."

"Of course," Nate said with a smile, "You have to be before your first performance."

Today was the day. The day Caitlyn was going to sing. At a Connect 3 concert. In front of all the screaming Connect 3 fans. In front of all her friends. In front of her parents. She had a good reason to be nervous.

"You'll be great." Nate said with a smile before kissing Caitlyn's lips.

"I love you Nate." Caitlyn said after they broke apart.

"I love you too Caitlyn," Nate said with a smile.

Caitlyn buried her face in his chest again as she said: "You're absolutely amazing Nate."

Nate couldn't help but chuckle before he tightened his grip around Caitlyn and kissed the top of her head.

"I know… I'm crazy." Caitlyn said with a small grin.

"Crazy in love." Nate whispered with a smile. **(AN: sorry for the cheesyness!)**

* * *

Caitlyn stood in front of the mirror in her dressing room looking at herself. Was she really going to go through with this? She stepped closer her own reflection and looked closely at her own face. She looked terrified. She looked herself in the eyes. They were big and round and looking like they were waiting for something terrible to happen. She quickly closed them and leaned her head against the mirror. This was just another one of those doorsteps. She could do it. She knew she could. This was her time to shine. She should just go out there and open her heart to all those people who loved her. She opened her eyes again and looked into them. They still looked the same, but when she looked deeper she saw a bit of strength. A growing strength. She was going to do this. She knew it.

Caitlyn lifted her head as she heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." She said with a small voice.

"Hey" Nate said with a smile as he walked in.

Caitlyn hadn't spoken to Nate since this morning. It had been so busy all day between sound checks and getting ready for the night's show.

"You look great." Nate said as he walked over to where Caitlyn stood and embraced her in a tight hug.

"You'll be amazing out there," Nate whispered into her ear, "Don't worry."

He just seemed to know how she felt. Well he could probably also see it in her eyes. It was quite obvious.

Caitlyn looked into his brown calm eyes. She should do this for Nate. All he had done to make her feel better. She knew that, whatever happened Nate would still be there in the end. But something inside of Caitlyn told her that there was no ending. That this was a new beginning. That was the strength in her eyes. It was hope.

Nate bent down and kissed her. Caitlyn could tell that he had put a lot of effort into that kiss, and really wanted to make her feel better. When he pulled apart Caitlyn had a big smile across her face.

"It's gonna be alright." Nate said with a smile.

"I know," Caitlyn said and nodded, "It's gonna be great…" She whispered the last part, still with a smile on her face.

The song she was going to sing was about Nate. She owed him that. Only the band had heard it. Caitlyn couldn't wait to play it for Nate.

* * *

Before she knew it Caitlyn stood ready to go on stage. The boys were out performing and she knew that when the song they were playing ended she would be called on stage. A lot of thoughts flew through her head as she stood there waiting with a microphone in her hand. What if the crowd didn't like her? Of course they just wanted Connect 3 to stay on stage. She had to remind herself that she didn't do this for Connect 3's fans but for herself and for Nate.

Suddenly she heard Nate said: "...Now we would like to introduce you to one of our very best friends…"

"Caitlyn Gellar everyone!" Shane finished

The crowd had obviously expected someone they knew and not some random girl. Caitlyn just stood nailed to the place. Nate turned around and looked her straight in the eyes. The look he gave her made her move out onto the stage. She looked around and didn't know how she had ended up out there. The only thing she could see was the strong light in her eyes.

Suddenly the music started playing. Caitlyn closed her eyes and saw a picture of Nate. She started to sing. She sung to him.

_I don't need a lot of things  
__I can get by with nothing  
__Of all the blessings life can bring  
__I've always needed something  
__But I've got all I want  
__When it comes to loving you  
__You're my only reason  
__You're my only truth_

_I need you like water  
__Like breath, like rain  
__I need you like mercy  
__From heaven's gate  
__There's a freedom in your arms  
__That carries me through  
__I need you_

Caitlyn's eyes were now wide open. The crowd had started to cheer up a bit and it made her more comfortable on the stage.

_You're the hope that moves me  
__To courage again  
__You're the love that rescues me  
__When the cold winds, rage  
__And it's so amazing  
_'_cause that's just how you are  
__And I can't turn back now  
_'_cause you've brought me too far_

_I need you like water  
__Like breath, like rain  
__I need you like mercy  
__From heaven's gate  
__There's a freedom in your arms  
__That carries me through  
__I need you  
__Oh yes I do_

_I need you like water  
__Like breath, like rain  
__I need you like mercy  
__From heaven's gate  
__There's a freedom in your arms  
__That carries me through  
__I need you  
__Oh yes I do  
__I need you  
__I need you_

As she ended the song she couldn't believe that she had done it. The place was going crazy. Suddenly she saw her parents and some of her friends on the front row standing and cheering along with the rest of the crowd. Her smile grew. This couldn't get any better. She turned around and saw Nate in the back with the biggest smile on his face. He winked at her and motioned for her to look up. As she did she saw that her name was written all over the big screen in the back of the stage.

She ran of the stage very happy and satisfied. She stopped when she stood in front of Nate. He leaned in and whispered: "Amazing" in her ear before running off to the stage again.

Caitlyn walked back to her dressing room to try and calm herself down. She was absolutely flying. It was such an amazing feeling.

* * *

After the boys had ended the concert Nate went to find Caitlyn. He knocked on the door to her dressing room.

After a moment she opened the door and when she noticed that it was him she fell into his arms. Nate hugged her and moved so they were both inside the room and he could shot the door behind him.

"That was so amazing!" Nate exclaimed excited, "I didn't know you were _that _good!"

Caitlyn looked at him and tilted her head to the side: "Was it _that _good?"

"You have no idea." Nate said sincerely, "But one question."

"Yes…" Caitlyn said.

"Was it about me or him?" Nate said seriously

Caitlyn stared at him for a moment

"You of course Nate." She said even more serious.

"Good," Nate said the smile coming back to his face, "I just got really amazed that you would write such a beautiful song about me, but then I realized that I couldn't be sure that it wasn't an old song or something, from before I came along."

Caitlyn smiled. "I would never write something like that about anyone else than you." She said sincerely. I never loved anyone the way I love you."

"I never loved anyone the way I love you either." Nate said with a smile, "I'm so proud of you. And I'm sure our fans would like to see you again soon."

Caitlyn reached up to kiss Nate and the two of them ended up kissing very passionately. Caitlyn knew that this was a new start for her and she would go through everything with Nate.

* * *

**I had to make it a happy ending ;P - Please make it an even happier ending and review..(:**

**Song: LeAnn Rimes - I Need You**


End file.
